My name is Lauren, I’m in my mid-to-late 30s, and I live with two cats in an apartment in Lancaster, a small city in Pennsylvania. I’m trying to attract crows to my front porch, but so far they’re snubbing me.
I’ve formatted the rest of this page in a mock FAQ, because I think that will make it easier for me to figure out what to say. Let’s go!
Where else are you online?
Instagram and Twitter: @el_manels
Why a website, and why call it Words For Friends?
The answer to the why a website part is here.
The credit goes to my longtime friend Ryan for the “Words For Friends” idea; he suggested it when I crowdsourced on Twitter for business name ideas. He pointed out that besides the nod to the popular gaming app, “friends” is one way I like to address people when I’m writing on social media.
And, “friend” is a concept that interests me re: Anabaptism, a topic I’m intrigued by for a variety of reasons. My town has a large Anabaptist population, dating back to the 1720s, and that continues to impact our local culture in many ways — most (but definitely not all; they’re still mired in patriarchy) of them positive and to our benefit, IMHO. My Pop-Pop’s family was Quaker, which brings us back to that unique concept of “friend:” this is what Quakers call one another, in recognition of their belief that the “light of God” exists in each of us, and our individual lights are all united.
I’m also drawn to this…
Many Quakers consider themselves Christian, and some do not. Many Quakers today draw spiritual nourishment from our Christian roots and strive to follow the example of Jesus. Many other Quakers draw spiritual sustenance from various religious traditions, such as Buddhism, Judaism, Islam, Hinduism, and the nature religions.
– FGC Friends
…and this, because since childhood I’ve felt deeply at odds with the concept of God as humanlike, let alone male:
Quakers use many words to describe the Divine. Some of them include: God, the Light Within, Christ, Spirit, Seed, and Inward Teacher.
– FGC Friends
I don’t subscribe to a particular religion — I’m most drawn to absurdism, I’m very comfortable not knowing things! — but I continue to be fascinated by it, especially the ways it can impart both beauty and horror on people’s experiences in the world. If there is a Jesus watching us, I am confident he doesn’t give a crap about things like people making love or boning (both are wonderful and they’re not mutually exclusive, either, as Tenacious D points out) before marriage. Let’s see if one of my parents asks me to delete that last line someday, I’ll report back if so.
Pro- or anti- Tik Tok?
VERY PRO
Have you got a boo?
I’ve been single for a few years now, after ending an 11-year partnership with a man I figured would eventually become my husband. This gave myself, my family, and most of my friends a huge sigh of relief, to put it diplomatically. (Don’t worry, I’m certain he’s never going to come across this website and see that.)
I haven’t dated much since then, because I’ve been working with a therapist on how to avoid relationships with manipulative people. The key is self-worth! Also, of course, the pandemic happened.
I did very briefly date the plumber my friend Dana calls on to unclog the drains of her hair salon. Watching that man perform manual labor, such as chopping wood, was… woooo, it was pleasant. But my fondness for him dissolved when he invited me over for dinner and I saw the Confederate flag hanging in his “workout area.” Nothing kills a vibe faster than a racist butthole, yeah?
Words For Friends 